Do YOU need a writer or a cartoonist, or someone who can do a vaguely passable impression of Alan Rickman? Are you troubled by strange noises in the middle of the night? Do you experience feelings of dread in your basement or attic? Have you or your family ever seen a spook, spectre or ghost? If the answer is “yes,” then don’t wait another minute. Pick up the phone and call the professionals…hang on, that’s for something else. Sorry.